Email from Home: Saturday, May 21, 2022

From: Mom
Date: Saturday, May 21, 2022
Subject: Love

Hey

How was your week this last week? How are things moving in your mission world? How are things with your companion? Were you able to get some clarification with President Proudfoot on how to get goals within the branch met as well as goals within the mission?

This week was a lot of processing for us here at home. Tyler's cousin losing his 10 year old son has been super hard. There have been lots of questions surrounding all of it and it has opened up a lot of doors to discuss hard things between us here at home.

We went to the funeral today and to say that it hurt is an understatement. I don't even know Dawson. I barely know his parents Nate and Jaime. But as I listened to his Uncles talk today and as I watched the emotion from the Bishop and Stake President who were in attendance, it was clear that Dawson emulated 'love'. Not just love but Christlike love in all things he did. There were countless numbers of teammates, friends from school, friends from the neighborhood and church, and friends that were family members who all said the same thing, "Dawson was my best friend". This young boy at 10 years old made it a point to always make sure that whoever he was around knew that he loved them and he valued them. They talked so much about the word love and all that it meant when it comes to him that even the corners of this small casket had the word engraved on each one. It was a very difficult service to sit through but one that I walked away from wanting to be a better person because of what I learned about Dawson. I hope that one day when it is my time to return home that others will be able to say that I too emulated Christlike love in all that I did. I also learned that it doesn't matter how old your kids are...it is okay for Mom to tell them that I love you. I hope that you know just how much I do. It gets said a lot around here I know that but to take a step back and to really feel what those three words mean, I pray you know without any question just how much.

As Tyler and I drove home from Wellsville (Logan) today it was a moment to really reflect on the importance of family and the relationships that I pray you and the girls will have for forever. I hope that you will all remain close and that your spouses and children will be close. I pray that my home will become normal and something that you all enjoy being in together and creating memories together. I pray that each day only gets better with the time that we spend. I know Tyler feels the same way. He loves you and is so proud of all you are doing.

The other thing that really struck me today was the song "Families Can Be Together Forever". There was a piano solo that was played and I used to really love this song. I used to not be able to listen to it without tears streaming down my face. Today I felt something different on my heart. There was a sting in knowing that right now, if something were to happen to you or to Kaitlyn, there isn't a sealing for either of you. I know that this isn't my choice and I know that because of choices made years ago I have put this predicament on my own heart but today it stung. I pray that one day things will be different and that I can know for a surety that our family can be together forever. Never have I wanted anything more than to be able to kneel across an alter from you and from Kaitlyn, being joined into the eternities as a family. Today was black and white even more so and I am grateful the Holy Ghost was there to comfort my sting and to allow me to feel the feels surrounding the importance of this ordinance. I will hope for the rest of my life that this path will be one that you will stay on so that one day you will be able to choose a spouse and be sealed to her and then any children blessed to you will be born in the covenant. What a great blessing that has been given to us. <3

This next week ahead is hopefully a little more quiet. Quiet in that we can get into a normal groove of routine. B has a busy week with volleyball lessons on Monday, she has what we are hopeful will be her last dermatologist appointment on Thursday and then she gets her wisdom teeth out on Friday morning. It is a holiday weekend with it being Memorial Day next Monday so hopefully she will be able to heal and recover enough that going into the last week of school she will feel good and be able to enjoy herself. I cannot believe how quick this school year went by! She is already dreading next year for a couple of reasons. It counts (ha) and they changed start/end times. They will start at 8am and go until 3pm Monday through Thursday and then 10am-3pm on Fridays. It is a joke and there are plenty of parents who are more than a little ticked off to say the least. I imagine not many kids will attend school on Fridays with a 10am start time. :/

Anyways, I love you. I love you more than you will ever know. I am grateful that you chose me in the pre-mortal life to be your Mom and that you trusted me enough to stick by that choice. I am grateful for the lessons you teach me and the journey you have allowed me to be a part of. I pray you are happy and that with each passing week you are in Africa that you are learning something new, your testimony and faith in the Lord is growing, that you can see purpose and reason that you are there at this very moment, and that you can feel and know without a shadow of any doubt that the Lord loves you and is so proud of you too. I hope you have a great Sunday and can feel of the love from all of us here at home.

I love you for forever,

Mom